I had to file a complaint to the police last week

When I’m out attached to my Triride, I get a fair bit of ‘ attention’ from other road users. Until now, all positive or neutral… but last week – oh wow.
I was heading to Ealing Broadway station, for a look. It’s part of the Crossrail project, and as such has been massively upgraded, including having lifts to all platforms. It’s odd isn’t it, that ‘ main ‘ stations can NOT have lifts, in 2021, but lots actually don’t.
Now it HAS though, which means I can leave town by another route, far more easily.

Anyway, on the way there, I got properly harassed. It was a 20mph zone, and I was doing 20, keeping to the kerb as a cyclist would.
This Audi A3 3.5 turbo went past me at at least 50, with the horn pressed for a good 10 seconds. To be honest I thought it was probably a bloke just saying ‘ cool chair mate’ cos that’s what I always seem to get.
Of course in London you always catch up with cars at the inevitable next traffic lights.. so when I did, I passed just car and tooted my own horn as I went passed. Their window was open and what I got back was ‘ FUCK OFF, YOU C*** ‘.
Well that was a surprise tbh… and I then got the same flak when the car soon passed me again.
At the next lights I pulled alongside, and asked the ( young – 30?- ) slight female what her issue was. I said she was harassing me and I’d report her. She said ‘ too late, you C***, I’m already reporting you!’ I asked ‘for what exactly?’ She said ‘ for being on the road ‘.

Well that’s a first… evidently I’m supposed to just stay in and watch Countdown, until I die… and not venture out unless it’s on The Sunshine Bus.

When you fill in the online form for the police, almost the first question is ‘ Are you disabled?’ Disability hate crime is obviously being addressed then. ..

So I got a visit within a few days and well, they take it seriously, as they should. I can’t imagine for a minute that she’ll be prosecuted, because it’s my word against hers, and she’ll lie. But if she gets a talking to, and thinks twice next time then that’ll be a victory.
If you are on a bike tho and see an Audi, Reg no below..

do watch out.

She’s an angry one.

🤷

I met up with someone I know in Regent’s Park yesterday.
Well it’s a lovely place, and it’s not that far. A couple of tubes and a bit of Triride’ing.
Anyway… come going home time I realised that they’d locked all the exits. People were climbing over the high railings all over the place. Well how am I gonna do that !!?

I was about to call the Fire Brigade!
Then I saw a fella in a Warden type jacket…. And he let me out… I mean they COULD have someone going round with a loudhailer, giving a 15 minute closing warning. I mean surely that would be reasonable? How long before someone sues them for ‘injuries sustained during an escape, after unexpected imprisonment ‘ or something?

Another adventure… almost! 🤦‍♂️😂

I had a Christmas party last night!

Presents and Slade, and Shakin Stevens etc etc. Even a Secret Santa

For a few years now I’ve held a little dinner thing at Christmas for about 10 peeps – always the same ones, but of course it was all COVID cancelled in December..

So I had it last night.
Well I tell you, having Xmas in warm weather is much better! Outside In the open air.. bloody marvellous.

That’s what the Aussies do, right?

We shouldn’t find out when the Aussies do their Xmas and do the same….
🤪

Isn’t normal life a laugh!
In the last four days I’ve been to two comedy clubs, a party , a BBQ In Orpington, had friends for lunch and ( lots of ) drinks, and been to watch a football game actually in someone else’s house.

Thanks to Toby, to Kim, to Rob and Belinda, and to Chris for their hospitalities… ( though that’s not a word )

And I’ve really been aware of my Mojo flooding back, which is a blimmin relief. I thought it was gone for good, but no, I am back to being me again.

So Brentford beat Swansea, which means that my frozen season ticket from last year ( or was it the year before that?) is now valid for this forthcoming season. I’ve only ever been to 2 football games, but I’m going to be going to quite a few, as of soon. And of course I get a free companion ticket, so book early to avoid disappointment! Yes you may have to do the odd thing to help me, but cmon, I’m worth it !

And the sun has finally come out.
I’ve actually got a tan. Factor 50 makes me go far browner than having factor zero on. That’s strange, isn’t it?

Things are certainly looking up. Lots of gigs to go to in the near ish future, and even a trip to Portugal.

The Bird Man of Brentford flies again!

And good luck to my lovely mum tomorrow, in hospital. It’ll be fine, I’m sure. ❤️

It’s a bit heady, isn’t it.
Nothing for more than a year and then –

a comedy club tonight

another tomorrow, as well as a lunch with Yukon Rob and his new girl

a party on Saturday

a bbq on Sunday.

Not sure I’ll cope 😂

Conversation just now with two 12 year old boys, on their bikes. ..

( about my Triride ). ‘ THAT IS SICK!!

Me – thanks.

‘CAN YOU WHEELY IT ?! ‘

Ha – no I can’t

‘Can I have a go in it, and try?’

No… because I can’t get out of it.

‘Oh, ok then….. ( not understanding why I can’t, I think )

But yeah… ALL teenage boys love the Triride MadMax!

And after 8 months plus of Lockdown lovin’… Lizzy and I have parted company.
Irreconcilable differences…

We got each other through the worst of lockdown, stayed together through the interminable winter of 20/21, and split up just when there was actually something to go out and do!
Yes, that does sound a bit daft. I can see that.

She’s a superstar lady, and we’ll probably remain friends. Thank you Lizzy for the times we had together. No regrets on my part.
The traveling back and forth to Sevenoaks I shan’t miss. Trains and the ‘ I don’t know if the ramp will arrive to get me off ‘ bit … well that bit isn’t my favourite.
Once there, Lizzy was always the perfect hostess ( with the most’ess obvs ).

But Russ n Lizzy.. that’s RIP.

I wonder what 2021 will be like?

I went to the Banksy exhibition today ( and thanks to Lizzy for the tickets! ). Lizzy sadly couldn’t go .. so I ended up inviting me old Uni buddy Mark C.
He’s bloody clever, is Banksy. Anonymous of course, which adds to his persona… but obviously a VERY clever guy.

Loved it.

For the first two and a half years of living where I do, next to the water, and with plenty of trees and greenery around ( albeit opposite, across the canal ), other than water birds I hadn’t seen anything. Ok, the occasional pigeon perhaps, but literally that was it.
Additionally I never saw any bees either.
Last year I bought some potted foxgloves, and all of a sudden I had bees… but still no birds.
I don’t know if that’s because the land I live on had industrial use for decades, so maybe it just wasn’t on birds’ radars.
Anyway, I ordered a multi feed bird feeding station, as well as my Dad knocking up a fence attachment, got suet balls and peanuts and seeds…. But months on and still zilch.

Then about 2 weeks ago I saw a blue tit. And a robin, otherwise nothing.

Two days ago I got a flock of starlings… !

Well since then it’s gone bloody crazy. At the moment for example I have the starlings. Just now I had a woodpecker!! I’d never ever seen one, and now I have one visiting my terrace!! Earlier I had 3 parakeets and a magpie. I’ve had tits and a sparrow.

Suddenly I’m like Saint Francis of Assisi – he’s the patron Saint of birds..

And it’s a lovely feeling to be surrounded by birds.

As every fella will tell you.

So as the lockdown comes closer to being ( almost ) over, I, like everyone else, start to plan stuff to do. Just imagine… groups of people INDOORS (!) together…?

I booked a table for 5 people for tomorrow, INSIDE the new Brentford football stadium. Not exactly being a football fan, it’s a new thing for me, but hey, here we go

Now I thought I’d fire up the iBot and give that a try. Well it’s far better in a busy place, where people stand up, to be at the same height as everyone else n all.
So , with help, having pumped the tyres up ( electric tyre pump ) and got the batteries charged up, I switched it on last night at 9pm. At that point I’m by myself, so unable to actually get into it and drive it. Anyway It turns on and within a few minutes it starts to flash and beep, with the red EMERGENCY ALERT sign going off. Of course I don’t actually know what this means, except for it being serious.
The alarm sound it’s giving off is quite loud, and it’s parked right outside my bedroom window. I try to turn it off, but now the turn off sequence isn’t working. I try it over and over probably a hundred times.
There’s no way I’d easily sleep if that keeps going all bloody night.
I can’t get in it to drive it somewhere else and hop out again, can I ? So I have to position myself in front of it, facing backwards, and, being just able to reach the joystick, drive it through, and around, all the obstacles on my outside terrace, with it pushing me ( backwards ) im front of it. I can’t see where I’m going, because I’m being pushed backwards, and anyway it’s dark..
To be fair it’s pretty amazing that it worked, and that I got it to where I wanted, but I had to leave it outside ( under cover ) with the alarm going off all night.
This morning, my help, with the benefit of daylight, helped me again. I had this theory that if I blasted the control panel with hot air, it might improve the functionality of the buttons.. so for 10 minutes we had a big fan heater on it.
Well lo and behold that actually worked …. and G helped me transfer to it. The plan was to go half a mile to a local plant sale… which we did…. except almost straight away the red alert siren went off, and stayed going off. In emergency mode it doesn’t really do anything clever ( won’t raise up, won’t go into 4 wheel drive etc etc ) so there s little point in using it. ..
I think maybe that’s the end of my lovely iBot..

There’s a fella called Alejandro in the US that I’ve messaged. If anyone can help me, he can, so I’m awaiting a reply, and in the meantime I’m still using hot air to warm the control panel. It definitely works when warm, and doesn’t when cold. Maybe there’s moisture inside..

End of a little era, I fear!