Monthly Archives: December 2018

A Christmas 💥er…

A russian cargo ship has been stranded on a sandbank at falmouth .

The R.N.L.I sent a message to the russian crew to remain calm, and that they would be tugged off when the weather improved.

The captain said that was very kind as they had only hoped to be rescued.

It’s the way he told em.

Really brilliant Christmas dinner last night in my flat. Lots of lovely friends came, and also Tommy Cooper from the dead – yep true.

Thanks to Chris H for interrupting his world tour by plane and bus to be with us for the last hour. Something to do with drones attacking Gatwick airport and his flight from Antigua going to Newcastle instead… mmmm sounds unlikely to me. If he wanted to miss the starter he could have just said?!

Leigh proved himself the music quiz maestro of 2018. Sign of a misspent youth ( life ?) ?

Thanks to everyone for helping, to the chef/esses, and to G for cleaning up this morning!

Top occasion overall, and my iBot helps me so much in social situations- being 6 foot is great!

On solids now.

As well as my iBot, I received my solid tyres yesterday for my regular wheelchair. The upside is NO MORE PUNCTURES/PUMPS/REPAIRS. Brilliant! The downside is getting the bloody things on the wheels. They are thick, solid rubber and that stuff doesn’t stretch a whole lot. Lateral thinking and a large screwdriver as a lever, and about 20 large cable ties and I got them on.

It did take me 2 hours to do it though, and that was working efficiently at it. Definitely not a job you can do in a hurry, as you’d have no chance. Amazingly they came without any fitting instructions so I guess they just leave you to it and hope you can manage?

Anyway, I did manage. Very nice they look too ( as far as tyres can, that is ).

Tonight I have Christmas dinner for 12 at mine – should be a laugh. Got a dozen of my best friends coming ( well 10 plus Wendy, plus me, obvs ) I had to buy 2 tables and 12 chairs that I didn’t previously have. When you are in a wheelchair, furniture doesn’t half get in the way, so all/ most of it will be folded and put away again after Christmas.

I’m supposed to be having my catheter changed today too. Let’s hope he doesn’t f it up again like last time…. that wouldn’t be great for the party…


Not wasting any time, I went in my PhoenixiBot to the O2 last night with Wendy, to see Nile Rodgers and Chic. That guy has sold 55 million song items that he’s contributed to. That makes him pretty successful then as a writer/performer, I’d say.

The iBot was its marvellous self, and didn’t run out of charge (!) which represents a massive plus compared to how it worked before. A big shout out to my man Lester, and to Alejandro in the States 🕺

And a very large one for Wendy too.

The resurrection.

And the iBot lives on, born again, risen like a ( flightless ) Phoenix from the ashes. Today I went with G to Morrison’s ( no less ) and bought some potatoes. So high was I that I couldn’t reach low enough to pick up the spuds, so G did for me. 

In the manner of females ( apologies for this one ) she seemed not to really notice, never mind be amazed and astounded by the thing suddenly standing up on 2 wheels….. I looked for a reaction to this mechanical miracle balancing itself, but there was none. 

Oh well, never mind, it’s not her that’s in it, it’s me. 

First impressions are that the rejuvenated batteries and new charger will make it better than I’ve ever had it. 


Good grief.

Unaccustomed as I am to pretty much anything going well, I am fairly gobsmacked when the iBot charger that I found in America, bought, paid to be shipped, and eventually got through customs, is actually charging both batteries in my iBot as I type. 

Since my Carer a year ago broke the charging unit plug and started the demise of my iBot, it’s been a series of false starts and unbroken dawns. But now, suddenly there is real hope I think. Lester my self schooled Tech’y help  installed the new cells that I bought in America, about 6 months ago, but they just wouldn’t charge up. Was it the batteries, or the iBot wiring, or the charger at fault, or 2 ( or 3 ) out of those 3? 

Well tonight it looks like I’ll have a fully charged iBot, that may just work tomorrow ( or the day after) when I hopefully try it, having found someone to help me. 

I’m guardedly optimistic to be honest. It’s been charging away for about 4 hours which is amazingly promising. 

Blimey, fingers crossed. 

The day after my girlfriend asked ‘ so what colour did your hair used to be then…..?’ things are looking up. 

For Rob

Tiger tiger burning bright
Who set Chester Zoo alight?

Work that into your blog, said my mate Rob.
There you go Rob.

Chester zoo caught fire and the cockroaches and frogs are no more. But all life is equal, right?

For better or for worse.

Well shut your eyes and she sounds like Lily Allen.  Open em and you see a white Beyoncé- all trouser suit, stilettos and waist length hair.  When did THAT happen? Does ‘ she look amazing ‘ or has she totally sold out…? Well that’s up to you isn’t it? Personally I felt she had lost all ‘ credibility and edge’ but maybe I’m an old romantic. Keith Allen (her Dad) would be turning in his grave, well he would be if he was dead, at her ‘ image remodelling ‘.  

So… for me LA Lily 4/10. 

Close my eyes and 8/10. 

Another one bites the cosmetic surgery dust.