Finally.. unblocked? Hard to be sure.

As I’ve not eaten for a week my arms are about half the size they were last week.

Christ almighty I look like I did 10 years ago here – emaciated with huge loss of muscle mass.

🤦‍♂️

Christ I am now so hacked off with this situation. It’s an interminable waiting game for my bowel tract to unblock. If it doesn’t then it’s surgery again.
Me and this hospital have a long association.
None of it is positive.

It was the place I was flown to from Toulon in 2013. It’s where I was first put in a wheelchair.
I was In intensive care back then and my life had changed for ever In every way.

I get that painful flashback again and again. Being here is like being trapped in a nightmare.
I wouldn’t be surprised if today is the anniversary of my first ever trip outside in a wheelchair.
I did exactly that today and it was a full on PTSD type mental experience.
I so want it to be over.
This place sucks the life out of me, it really does.

Back in hospital at 2am on Friday, after leaving here on Wednesday.
I was repeatedly blocked up, and yesterday to an extreme degree.
Everything I swallowed I vomited back up with extra and I therefore got progressively more dehydrated. God I felt like shite. Truly.

I waz throwing up this green coloured fluid by the end. I don’t even know what it was, because it didn’t even taste like sick.

I’m now in hospital with this disgusting tube up my nose. Christ it’s uncomfortable, up you’re not se and down your throat. It sucks vomit from your stomach. It’s like some medieval torture and it’s been in for 3 hours.
Like I needed to be tortured after a fairly unpleasant week.

I came home yesterday.
I figured my own environment was going to be better adapted ( literally) for me than the hospital ( which was true ).

Tube and road for the Buddha in the wheelchair.
Gina followed me in a bus ( other than being with me on the Tube).

I was still MASSIVELY BLOATED- it’s not a great look tbh – but I knew it would be finite.
One high point was suddenly feeling sick 🤢.
Not been sick for about 8 years, and it’s not like I can rush to the loo or even lean over the bath or any of those types of things.
I grabbed a plastic bag just in time .. before chucking up 3 times.
I had to then wheelchair to the loo using one hand at a time, around several corners, swapping the full bag from hand to hand…
And spilling some…

I then had to avoid wheeling through the sick. Well once it’s on your wheels it goes wherever you go.
Bit of a nightmare then at a time I felt pretty low anyway.
Anyway I managed to sort it out, going back with disinfectant wipes and a long handled grabber to clean the floor.

I’d felt beyond sleepy prior to that .. but it’s amazing how awake that situation made me… 🤷💦💦💦

I had to wait a few hours for Gina to get back and she stayed here last night too.
Yes she had to be asked to help me several times, predictably ,
so just the biggest thanks to Gina for the last 5 days.
Overnight about 3 litres of urine came out of me as well as the other stuff 💩. At last progress has been made!
Different rules apply to me with ‘ bowel management post op ‘. I need a 💩 load more laxatives etc than a normal body would, or else I stay like a Buddha who owns a cake shop.

So I’m getting there!
Still bloody painful tho.

Thanks to Roy, Russ, Chris and Toby for being visitors. I was so sleepy throughout , I was nodding off continuously.
They aren’t boring guys! Honest! It was me and my drugs interacting.

I’m going to have to take it easy these next few days ( think the hospital said next few months ) but that’s not going to happen. Too much to do!

Stomach far flatter than yesterday but hardly Kat e Moss just yet.
Yesterday I thought my stitches were going to burst under the pressure, but they didn’t!

And Wales thrashing Australia was a tonic tbh. Can’t recall watching that happen EVER before.

Spasms definitely less too. That was the objective and so far it’s working.
Early days tho!

Having abdominal surgery makes you bloat.
Lying down makes your lungs fill with phlegm.

Then you want to cough up the phlegm.
Except when you cough that stresses the stitches in your stomach.

Talk about being stuck between a rock and a hard place. Desperate to cough up the crap in your lungs but every cough hurts like hell. Like being stabbed in the stomach.

Also just a case of having to wait for the gas to come out… aided so far by 3 packets of sugar free polos.
Normally that would give me drastic diarrhoea but no sign of that happening. Just a blessed signing fart every now and again.

🙏

This time for ‘abdominal’ surgery.

Plan – to do something about my spasms

Really working on those all the time. Intense pummel massage on parts of my legs which seem to be the ‘ knots ‘ .. and now surgery to alter my digestion ..

So, 22 to 26th I’ll be yet again in hospital.

Go me.

I’ve had far worse!
😂

It’s definitely the future…

She ( the sex robot ) makes repeated reference to
‘ your bitch wife ‘, and how unlike her she is programmed to be.

😂

Well that was interesting.
In a way not being able to ‘ feel ‘ being naked perhaps makes it easier to be?

Anyway those doing the painting/ drawing all seemed happy with me. I’ll be a novelty at least!

Can’t imagine there are many paraplegic life models happy to ‘ risk ‘ the experience.

Maybe I’ll be a MASSIVE demand.

Then again, maybe that’ll be it!?
😂♿️

Now here’s something I didn’t imagine doing, particularly in a wheelchair.. mind you that’s pretty much everything I do tbh! 😂

Anyway… tonight I’m going to be a Life Model.
Yep.. naked in a wheelchair and a roomful of strangers/ perverts drawing me.

Wonder how that’ll go down .. both ways.

In 2023 anything is allowed, right?

I might be in demand going forward.. become an Icon…?

But probably not. 😬

For some Godforsaken reason, people from America keep standing next to me and TALKING REALLY REALLY LOUDLY.

Wtf is wrong with Americans?
The person they are talking to is right next to them and still they SHOUT.

One yesterday was a french girl who’d clearly learned English in America.
The consequence? She shouted in a blend of French and American accented English.

The next one that does it is going to accidentally get crashed into at high speed by a wheelchair.