Monthly Archives: August 2018

From the ridiculous to the even more ridiculous.

So it seems that Henry Hendron is at least pausing in his trans ocean attempt, after AGAIN being rescued by the Coast Guard (!) on Day 2… after having been rescued on Day 1 already… I wonder if you get arrested on Rescue no 3 ? You should be.

Anyway, Henry ( i think a bit pissed ) last night ( while I was at a gig in Kings Cross with Chris H and Wendy – Grandmaster Flash 6/10 ) sent me about 30 messages, having realised that I was concerned about him, and probably  having received a lot of emails after my blog post…

It seems that he has revised his plan ( or now actually has a little one ), that being to do some online how to sail reading….well it’s woefully inadequate but it’s better than nothing.

Now for the good bit … he then suggested ( about 20 times, increasingly persistently, that I join him on the boat and crew for him. Apparently my wheelchair isn’t an issue on a small rocky boat, on the high seas, and any obstacles are only ‘ in my mind ‘. He even called me a coward for my declining his offer.

I spelt it out to him that he’d have to help me wash and dress and carry me up and down the little stairs, as that stuff hadn’t ( it seems ) occurred to him. Then he shut up, at least.

So we have a little hope ref Henry – he’s still got no chance of surviving a major storm in the Atlantic, but he may now get offshore, without being rescued, for a few days, though has to navigate one of the world’s busiest shipping lanes ( English Channel ) after that.

Hmmmm… you have to love him!

The Britney Show.

Well she definitely has still got it, and it’s a serious show that The Britney Corporation put on. She’s dressed like a hooker ( which is great ) and she’s got a lovely bum.

Its all way too over choreographed and she is a bit lost in the crowd on the stage.

I think she ought to forget about the running around the stage and the frenzied dance routines. She’s no Beyoncé and she doesn’t need to be. When she started it was all about suggestion rather than nudity.

I say that sometimes less is a lot more – so less stage show and more just Britney? But hey, what do I know, she pays a lot of money to a lot of people to keep that show going.

Maybe / definitely she’s not in control of her own image, just keeps paying people with their own self interest at heart.

Also, don’t talk Britney… you’re like David Beckham on helium.

Britney… 6/10 ( but I’m sure a lovely lady somewhere in there, Away from it all )

 

My mates….

When I first started kayaking, at 30, within a year or so I teamed up with a 21 year old public schoolboy type called Henry Hendron.

One of twins, he was random, brave, tough, charming, reckless and intelligent. We got on ever so well, I’d say. Neither of us would ever admit to being tired, or cold, or wanting to quit, even though at times we probably should have.

You can see why we got on, I reckon.

We’d go training in the dark and fast Thames at – 5 degrees at 5am in January, no life jackets, no lights, no safety precautions, no gloves, in shorts, with bare feet. Sometimes the ice would form around our bare fingers and toes so that the pain was intense and we’d have to prise frozen hands off carbon paddles. It was definitely a game to see if either of us would crack, but neither of us did, so it just got easier. The more adverse the conditions, the better we’d be, as other pairs suffered and we flourished.

We did well together, given his youth and my inexperience, but both went on to  have different partners in K2 racing, though stayed friends  You don’t do DW ( Devizes to Westminster canoe race ) with someone, and then lose contact. It’s such an intense bonding experience that you are forever connected, and we did it twice together, the second time as possibly the best crew, though came 4th ( due to the old rules – now altered ) Anyway, that’s all history

Henry went on to become a barrister, representing celebrity types and naughty politicians. He,  like his ( even better at canoeing brother ) came out as being gay, and went ‘ off the rails ‘ a fair bit, though still held it together professionally.

We raced again in the Yukon 1000 mile race in 2009 and actually crossed the finish line together, as joint winners and still 1000 mile record holders ( though Henry would have you believe that they won it alone if you asked him, conveniently forgetting the pair – myself and Rob C – that dragged them for the last 400 miles of river, at record breaking speed )

Anyway, never mind ( again )

Henry’s life went into reverse after ( as detailed by various newspapers ) he got into Chemsex parties – mostly gay drug and sex 48 hour parties – the premise of the gay, rich and powerful. Henry hosted a party in 2016, supplied the drugs and venue, but it turned into tragedy when he woke to find his 19 year old boyfriend dead beside him.

As Henry had supplied the drugs that ultimately had led to the boy’s death, he went to trial on a charge of manslaughter, but  he was convicted of supply only, it not particularly being in the public interest to send him  to prison, but he was struck off as a barrister, presumably for ever. As he’s too arrogant ( though in a ‘nice’ way, to work in a menial job, he’s  not done anything very productive since, and I’d say hasn’t cared a lot about anything since . Im Very familiar with thé ‘ well what does it matter if it goes wrong ?’

mindset , to the extent that nothing matters at all, any of the time, for a long time ( ‘ normal ‘ thinking completely disappearing  from the thought process )

Id say that that’s where Henry has been for a while. There is a reason why I write this post, and that’s because Henry, now  unemployed and free from any obvious responsibilities, has embarked on his possibly last escapade.

Get this – with NO experience of sailing AT ALL, he has decided to circumnavigate the globe by boat, and has already set off. He has bought a used trimaran and left the South coast of England in fair weather ( thinking possibly that’s how it always is, at sea ).

After a day, he had. to be rescued by the Cosst Guard off The Needles, not far from where he’d started. having found himself adrift with no engine, no technology, no sail skills and no idea of how to get himself out of trouble. To be totally fair, anyone with no experience of sailing would likely be the same,but that’s not exactly compensation. To most tho, it would be a sobering experience that would make you rethink your circumnavigation of the world’s most treacherous oceans, taking in the seasons and the  weather changes and the navigational complexities, not to mention the danger of coinciding with vessels much larger than oneself.

However, NOT put off, Henry has set sail again. I doubt if he has a planned route, let alone a plotted one, and doubt he has food and water and power or rescue back up options.

A friend of mine said that he’d be claimed by the sea within 2 weeks, and I can’t see how he’ll manage in a  seafaring emergency, with no experience. You can’t just wing it around the world in a tiny boat, can you?

If you know Henry, do me a favour and send him a message, telling him to stop, before he inevitably dies.

If you don’t know him, still send him a message and say the same.

I of course already have.

His email is

hhendron@me.com

and his phone number

‭+44 7957 683885‬

Seriously, I don’t want him to die yet.

Saturday

Reading Festival then.. not bad, definitely popular, well behaved crowd of mainly ( but not all ) under 22’s, all polite, all swearing less than the artists on stage. As a generalisation I’d say there was a inverse direct ratio of IQ and amount of swear words used. ( If that confused you, it means that the thicker they are, with the smaller amount of words in their available vocabulary, the more they say Fuck instead ). It didn’t used to be that acceptable to swear on stage to kids in the crowd, but now there is no one moderating it and anything goes. NERD and Dua Lupa are prime examples – thick as arseholes ( as my Dad would say ) , so just say Fuck ( you/ ‘ed Up/ off/‘ ing jump/ etc ) to compensate.

Sum 41 were good, and Panic at the Disco had about an hour set which they deserved. I reckon the organisers were a bit short of acts this year, so  bands got longer than they might have merited.

We only went for the day, and I’d say Sunday is a better day ( it’s the middle of the bank holiday long weekend ) but it’s raining today so Wendy and I lucked out.

Pissed and off their heads teenagers were not particularly in evidence,  so that was unexpected ( given what im told it’s like ).

I don’t think this generation of teens have any idea at all about what is truly bad behaviour, unlike my youth in South Wales, so they’re all pretty vanilla really. If you took 30,000 of my contemporaries and at 17 put them all in the same field and gave them loads of money for drinks, it would have been absolute mayhem and complete anarchy. A handful of overweight stewards in their 20’s would have been totally insignificant and far better off running for their own lives.

So from the ridiculous to the sublime, we are going to see Britney Spears tonight ( August 26th – perhaps my most memorable ever  August 26th, we’ll see ). I’d predict that Ms Spears at 37 has got her shit together quite well again, but who knows.. well I shall in about 7 hours time. Shes undoubtedly still sexy, but now mature too, so it does intrigue me a bit!

Reading Saturday 5/10 on thé Russ Gig Rating, btw.

All going on then…

The process of spine repair  has begun again then. I spent about 3 hours of yesterday inside big imaging type tubes – MRI and the like typa tubes. If I was the claustrophobic type and was desperate to make a  dash for it it would have been tricky, as I can’t move at all, did occur to me … as I’m not I seemed to just go to sleep during most of them, making it quite a nice experience, really…. I can’t ever sleep in the day, as I can’t get into bed, or sleep say bolt  upright ( with now a 20 degree lean to the left ) either, so it was a  novelty to do that.

The day started with me ‘ racing ‘ Carer across London – Triride vs Wheelchair adaptéd car for 10 Miles – Russ 1-0 Car by 10 Minutes

Then I was injected with a radioactive isotope at 11 am and told to come back at 2pm, and avoid children, the sick and the pregnant in the meantime ( and for about 8 hours in total ) – no, not joking… doh, my plans to visit the local ante natal and ill group in the nearest primary school dashed, we went for a coffee instead  I didn’t notice anything strange except the grass dying immediately when i tipped my urine from my attached leg bag  onto it, as it was full  Then within 10 seconds a 3 foot triffid like creature grew from the blackened soil  – all perfectly normal in North London possibly anyway?

Then we met the lovely and always interesting Chris H in Lords cricket ground ( where he works )  and had the usual funny conversation about all kinds of stuff.

At 2 it was scan start time, and it went on til 6pm, followed by a wheelchair car drive back through rainy  London  The amazing summer has stopped, hasn’t it? Never mind, it was good while it lasted, which was for ever, it seemed

A visit to Screwfix, something I’m allergic to to eat  ( bang, bloated stomach ) and a few jobs round the flat ( actually not far off finishing everything- few more weeks I reckon ) and into bed, where the sleep in the day meant only a few hours sleep in bed – always a payback isn’t there. Mind you it might be cos I’m glowing bright fluorescent green that I cannot sleep, having retired without My sunglasses?

Big thanks to Dom for organising the Gielgud theatre last night- 3 and a half hour play about Ancient Rome and it’s political warfare demonstrated that not much has altered in politics for over 2000 years- power , cash, and pocket lining still wins, and never mind the normal people …

Today I go to Reading Festival – possibly a few decades older than anyone else there, but I don’t care about that – it should be good

Thanks to Rob for spending Thursday putting up stuff for me and being his usual brilliant company af the same time – I now have far more order in my living room by virtue of a piece of Richer Sounds AV furniture ( assembled by Rob )

I’ve had to do a fair bit of email writing this week to contest 3 parking tickets caused by Boris parking my car illegally a while back  It’s the driver that’s responsible, not the car owner, so no way I’ll pay those  As he lives in Hungary, I’m sure it’s not over yet,  but as I said, I’ll be f’d if I pay.

I seem to contest all kinds of stuff these days by email, and always win too (?)  I like a little ‘ I know my rights ‘ letter and bang them off in minutes   It’s all a game isn’t it, and as I can’t race in boats, on bikes and on skis etc now, I can at least get a victory with words here and there

I’ve certainly taken control of my life in a big way again, and I’m not answerable to anyone other than the Law and HRMC now. It’s actually very liberating being not married etc – and it’s no wonder people opt for that increasingly after trying wedlock ( yes, the clue is in the word )

When i Triride’d to Shaftesbury Avenue on Thursday, at the red traffic lights in Piccadilly Circus, I weaved to the front and ended up between a Black Cabbie and a police RangeRover

I was sending a text when the cabbie said ‘ blimey mate, you’re taking a chance ( presumably texting ) with that police car next to you, aren’t you?! I laughed and said that it was probably FAR too much trouble to arrest me in a wheelchair than it was worth, paperwork wise, so I was ok ( I reckon that strictly speaking you have to have your engine running to commit a texting while driving offence, and my chair battery shuts down when stationary, so that’s very arguable )  At that point the Cop rolled down his window and looked me in the eye, then at my Triride, and at my phone. I looked back ( equally ) at him looking at me.

He said ‘ Hello ‘ in an authoritative way. I said ‘ Hi ‘in a smiley kind of way, and shot off when the lights went green.

Well it’s not even as though I have a number plate to write down, is it?

 

A comment.

Very funny, I love reading your comments re carers. My brother ****** also has the same problems.

At the moment he has two gay guys who are both very jealous over the relationship he has with his female long term carer/PA. To the point they have reported him to the care agency saying he’s having an affair with her! What if he is, who gives a damn. Small minded people. Good luck Russ. Xx

At my PC best?? Hopefully I’ll offend everyone at the same time…

My current carer is transgender.
What does that actually mean in terms of ‘ behaviour ‘ I hear you ask.

Well..
He can use a screwdriver
He can’t use a hoover very well
She always smells nice
He’s always well shaven
She’s moody
She’s tired a lot
They don’t like ‘ music blaring out’
She can cook well
He can use a drill, but he’s a bit messy
He definitely has princess tendencies
He’s in touch with his feminine side
She’s in touch with her Male side
They are both very absent minded
She’s very touchy about lots of things
They definitely seem to be a bit ‘ hormonal ‘
He doesn’t notice when things need cleaning
He is quite a good driver
He can use a map
He can understand directions too
She’s moody
She’s always ‘ ever so busy’
She’s always right
He’s definitely a feminist

I hope they laugh at this post, if they read it….

All ever so straightforward, isn’t it?

Well what would you do?

Pre injury I had an amazing life, for sure.

Does that mean it was exprensive to lead ?  Well no, not at all. I always did everything as cheaply as I could ( because that was ENGRAINED in  me by my parents)   and I always saw economy as the way to do things – and I was not well off, so I didn’t.

Now I live according to my means still. I do lots for sure, but I never go to restaurants ( ever )  and always get the cheapest ‘  seats ‘ possible for everything.  I smuggle in drink where I can, and if I have to I ‘ use’ the wheelchair card’ to save money.

I see that card abused so very often by others and don’t comment though, though it’s hard not to sometimes, people are such benefit frauds.

Overall I spend probably less than I used to by far, as I now am forced to pay for a Carer, so I have far less.

If you have any sense at at all, would you act any differently?