Category Archives: Events

The Big Apple ( as seen by a fella with no core). There’s a joke in there somewhere.

Events

It’s 5.40 pm in New York. 

I’ve given up, am too tired, the bloody wheelchair digs in to my disfigured rib cage on my right side, at the back, hurting all the time. 
I’ve been pushed 7 miles today ( I know cos my phone has an App….. )   That’s been pushed, not even pushed myself. 
We’ve been to Central Park ( icy, slippery paths ), FAO Schwarz ( the massive toy shop ), the Uggs store, Nike Town, a restaurant for lunch and God knows where in between… I’m not grumbling, but I am tired out. 
Dani booked tickets for 5.30 for us all to go up the Rockefeller Centre – the new best view of the city, and of the best Xmas tree in NY. She and the girls have just dropped me at the room. I’m in too much discomfort to have enjoyed it, and didn’t want to spoil it for them by grimacing thro the next 2 hours. 
This city is busy, packed with shoppers. It’s hard even being pushed, as I have to try to push my body back in the chair to stop myself falling forward, particularly at the many, many road crossings. 
 An awful lot of people are preoccupied by their mobiles so are on collision course with me until the last few feet. The consequent nervous tension in my shoulders steadily wore me down. 

I’ve had a good day, seeing my girls have fun. I’ve no interest in shopping now, for myself, it just seems pointless. I’ve got plenty of clothes, and fashion in a wheelchair.. well it just doesn’t seem the same. There’s no room for vanity in my life now; you have to be able to look into the mirror and like what you see, right?
Well that’s not the case any more. 

A lot of people got in touch with me after a lady (?) called Babs M called me arrogant. She’d taken offence to a flippant comment I’d made about dementia. Ive spent nearly 30 years of my professional life in the company of largely elderly people, and have had a very large ‘following’ for many years. Invariably they openly say that I’m honest, trustworthy and just plain nice and respectful, with a lot of fun thrown in. 
To allege that I’m anything other than the above is wrong. 
I actually made a joke about the prospect of MYSELF ending up as a wheelchair patient with dementia, and NOT making fun of other people who suffer this awful fate. 
Nothing would be further from my intention, and I removed my ‘joke’ and apologised. 

I didn’t start this blog, I inherited it. I sort of took it over from my hospital bed, simply to keep my mates posted as to my progress. 
I’ve not set out to be a social commentator, or to be profound or learned. I certainly didn’t intend for people I didn’t know to read it or be interested in it. 

Now I’m not sure what it’s purpose is. It’s definitely NOT supposed to be controversial, so I’d like everyone to resist being annoyed by anything they read on it. If you are, then please stop reading it. 

It’s just a diary written by a guy who fell off his bike when he should have been at home with his daughters. He wrecked his  life in the process, and very nearly the lives of  those he loves most. 
It may serve to educate people about the awful thing that is Spinal Cord Injury, and may be a help to other people who, God help them, befall this fate. 

I know it veers from manic depression to moments of contentment, interspersed with sometimes black humour from me, and other contributors.   But that’s how life is now for me… up, down and unpredictable. 

I don’t know how long I’ll keep it going for, I mean how interesting is some bloke’s life?  So if it just stops don’t be surprised. It doesn’t mean I’ve topped myself, it just means I think you’re probably bored. 

For now it stops me going f’ing mad though. 
Please, no comments about trivialising  insane people. 

Events

Russ,

Been reading blog and comments on same and totally agree!

The fact that you can fly defiantly in the face of all this by sharing
stuff that many others would struggle to even mention shows an inner
strength which must surely be rare! 

Your girls will surely grow up with a better understanding of love and life
than most and that is a rare gift to give them in a society where is all too
easy to be selfish and vacuous!

Good on you old chum!

Merry Xmas

Mel

:)

Events

Two people go cycling in France. One gets back safely.

The other suffers a horrific crash. He nearly dies, is airlifted to hospital where upon he does in fact die and is brought back to life again. He then is on lift support for weeks. He suffers broken ribs, punctured lungs and severers his spine. Eventually he ends up in Stoke Manville, in a wheel chair and has to go through the agony of relearning the very basics of living again.

Come the end of the year GUESS WHICH C*#* GOES SKIING FIRST?

John

Events

Well you made it. Albeit not a pleasant journey. Your girls are only seeing the relationship of caring between their mother and father; it’s not about cleaning up shit. Russ- your showing them what life should really be about. That’s a gift. This is a massive endurance test for you mentally and physically. Hang in there.

Cheers John. Merry Xmas to you too, my friend.

Events

Russ

Read the blog. I have to just say that I’m impressed. Despite hitting inflight turbulence mid-Atlantic you can still blog about it! Once again proving that as life lobs hand-grenades at you, you just keep picking them up and throwing them back.

Embarrassed, depressed, angry, sad…….ok, and perhaps I know bugger all about how it really feels.

But I’m still impressed!

Merry Xmas
John

Events

My wife just said something that made me happy. 

 

She said that pre accident I’d always told her about people in wheelchairs whose eyes I’d examined, and how nice I’d always been ABOUT them, as people. 
I’m glad she reminded me of that. 

Events

It’s mid flight and it would seem I’ve had ‘an accident ‘. 

This has turned what promised to be a pleasurable experience into, mentally, an awful one. 
Obviously babies do this all the time. They do something, the parent changes the nappy, sorted. Or the parents decide to leave it and clean the infant when they land, or even get to their final destination. 
The baby’s not bothered either way….
At about 4 , kids develop a/the sense of ’embarrassment’. That developed sense stays with humans for the rest of their conscious lives. 
At 47, mine’s very much alive and well. 
At this current time, I feel absolutely awful. Here I am, trapped in my seat, with  no option other than to sit here, then to disembark ( with help from at least 2 BA staff ) via an ‘aisle chair’, then to transfer into my own wheelchair, get thro customs, wait for the luggage, get into a taxi queue, transfer into a cab, get taken to the hotel ( about 90 minutes ), find our room, get onto a bed, then my poor wife has to clean me up, and in front of the kids too. 
I’m finding it hard to ‘deal with’ the next few hours in my head. 
If it was my baby I’d be a little uneasy at worst. 
But like I said, the baby doesn’t have the self consciousness issue that I do, and that all of you do.  
I talked to quite a few guys who’ve flown as paraplegic passengers. I think they all said they’d never had ‘ an accident ‘ 
Well just my f’ing luck then. 

Heathrow airport.

Events

Sitting in the airport lounge in T5, Heathrow. 

Wheeling through security, not the X Ray machine, being ‘patted down’ by security guard, who asked me to raise my two arms ( couldn’t do ) , then wondered what was attached to my leg.. Answer ‘ catheter ‘ What’s that, he said. 
Goes into my willy, drains urine into a bag  , I said. 
You can taste it if you like, I added.  
Slightly awkward smile. 
Further training required? Just a thought. 
Not his fault, bless him. 
At my new height all I seem to see are women’s bums. It’s quite nice, some of the time.
 Women dress up to catch planes, I think, improving the view down here. 
Cos I can’t give people a hug now ( midgets excepted ) I find myself patting thighs/bums instead. It’s not perverted, it’s just sort of practical!
If I pat yours, please don’t take offence. 
But if you’re a girl, bear in mind how I see the world, so make an effort? 😉
I’m only wearing a ‘leave in’ catheter for the trip. It means it’s unlikely that I’ll wet myself basically, essential when skiing. 
All that bumping around and falling over could result in a ‘leak’ otherwise. 
Sub zero temp’s and wet trousers, combined with no sensation …. Bad frostbite risk!
 Best avoided I feel. 
Surgical removal of toes not ideal at this moment. 
And looks crap in sandals.  
Ok, I’ll resume wine drinking now. 
In moderation sadly. Hmmm, life really has changed!

Another message.

Events

Bon Voyage lovely Boy! What an adventure you have ahead! No doubt they’ll be some tough moments and lots more ‘firsts’ but how much experience you’ll gain in such a short time. Not to mention all the love that will flow round you from that wonderful and supportive extended family  of yours. And I know to be spending 10 solid days with Dani, Lily and Amber will be the best Christmas gift ever! We’ll be thinking of you every day while you’re away and so look forward to seeing you in the New Year to hear all the stories……I’m sure the blog would go into overdrive if you tried to relay them all there! Go safely and enjoy! Don’t push yourself and just know that you have been utterly AMAZING thus far, more than anyone would think was possible, so don’t think you have to prove anything. Just enjoy. Love you loads and see you in 2014! CWxxxx