Another ‘This is the kind of stuff that happens to people like me ‘.
So yesterday I had realised that my catheter that goes into my tummy ( and through to my bladder ) was partially blocked. That meant that my right leg spasmed a lot.
With help I changed the catheter myself, and stopped the consequence of a blocked catheter, which is me pee’ing my pants.

Now I’d also anyway taken a laxative as I was blocked up ( more spasms due to that ) Now I can’t crap my pants because I have a stoma, and any diarrhoea will go into a bag, rather than come out of my bum, making it all ‘ safer’ . The instructions said that you’d go 8 hours after taking it, which was about right. At 4pm there was a watery explosion and hey presto …a bag full of diarrhoea.
The challenge tho was getting that bag off, and disposed of, and getting another clean bag stuck on, before/if there was another explosion, which would have otherwise gone all over my lap/ the wall/ floor/ room, cos let’s face it, diarrhoea is fast moving stuff.
I went into the bathroom to do just that… but having got the bag off, I hadn’t realised just how watery the contents were. I wasn’t ready for the spillover into my lap, or more accurately down my front and right onto / around the ( until then ) sterile catheter that I’d just put in.
The whole thing about catheters is keeping them clean, so getting mine coated in shite isn’t recommended usage.
As I can’t get up to clean or change myself I then had to scrub myself with soap and water and also disinfectant gel to try to kill all the bugs that would otherwise definitely lead to a UTI – a urine tract infection, as well as deodorise myself as well as possible.
I also then took antibiotics as a precaution, rather than risk infection.

It’s all a bit embarrassing, this whole thing, and of course doesn’t happen in the ‘ normal’ world. It was therefore quite cathartic when my girlfriend Lizzy ( a mum of two ) told me this morning that she’d come down in her house to her dog having shat all over her kitchen, which she had to clean up – an unpleasant job for anyone…

The dog had also squirted poo all over its sleep cage, it all coating the steel mesh. Lizzy said that as she was cleaning the cage, she was uncontrollably gagging so much that……… ‘ her pelvic floor gave way’.. ‘and she pissed herself’
…

What an attractive couple we make .. !