June 2019

And so on Day 3 of our trip to sort out an apartment so that it was ‘ suitable for my particular challenges ‘ we had the absolute pleasure of meeting up with Lee, my cheeky Scouser carer from a year ago, when accommodation circumstances did force me to actually live for a while in Portugal. Lee is a great fella, and we did have a laugh. For him laughing was probably far easier than it was for me at the time, as my spine metalwork was coming apart, I certainly had ‘ girlfriend issues ‘ ( definitely as much hers as mine, I’d say ), and I had no certainties regarding which country I’d be living in for some time to come… I had to sell a property and at the same time buy one in the UK to live in, as well as almost simultaneously deal with 2 other property transactions… all without actually being able to travel freely and ever ‘ be on site ‘ to keep track of. My mental state at that time was also most certainly unhappy, with my spasms continual, my 5 year anniversary of my paralysing crash looming dark upon me, my children completely absent from my life, and my divorce court stuff in full flow. When I caught a flight alone from Portugal ( unaccompanied for the first time since my mobility wrecking metalwork was inserted ) and headed for London I didn’t actually know whether my sale of one property and my purchase of somewhere to live in were actually going to go through, as both were actually happening as I was in the air, at 35,000 feet.
You can imagine the relief that I felt when I turned on my phone in Gatwick to check my emails, to find that I had actually sold, enabling me to fund the purchase in London.

Then I had to get to my new home, which had only a bed and not much else, and had to meet a new live in carer ( the dark presence that I named Boris ) for the first time, and then set about coordinating the move of furniture from portugal to London ( by van ) so that I had stuff in my new home. I’d also arranged to meet a online date on my first night back, and then go to Swansea ( Wales ) with her the next day to see The Killers… getting back at 3am.

When I think about it, I must have been f’ing mad to have tried all that, and actually get away with ALL of it at the same time? I think it says quite a lot about my mental state at the time – I cannot have been right in the head. That’s the thing about my head injury and brain concussion that I sustained in my crash – although at any given time I might think I’m thinking rationally, when I look back a year later, it’s definitely debatable that I was at all ‘ sane ‘ …

So what has changed a year on then? Well I’ve had major surgery to my spine metalwork ( hopefully for the last time ), I’ve got a lovely place that’s actually suitable for me to live in that I hope to stay in til I cop it, I’ve been through all my divorce court stuff ( though am still to hear a verdict – 3 weeks after it finished?! ), I am ( a little ) in touch with my kids, I have stability in my carer situation, I have a very modest place in Portugal that is now more or less workable for me ( making holidays far less emotionally stressful) and I have an amazing woman in my life, that I hope will stick around for ever.

Yes, a life in the year of me… maybe the next 12 months will be less eventful? Well surely they have to be…right?!?! 😂

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