I’m at the RGS.

Tonight’s talk –

lecture

The fascinating story of discovering and excavating the ship wreck of the Esmeralda, from Vasco da Gama’s 1502-1503 voyage, shedding new light on Portuguese maritime trade and warfare in the Indian Ocean.

Good to see Toby last night, and my deepest sympathies go to his family.

On Thursday Stella and I saw a play – Time and the Conway’s   It’s about a family, and charts the journey from youthful optimism to the realities of life and the crap way it can actually work out.

It resonated ever so strongly with me, I have to say.

Just had more bits of me burnt off with the Freeze  gun thingy at the Dermatology Clinic.

I asked, and she told me that they’d been using cryotherapy for years.

I asked if she’d do my whole body – put me into cryogenic suspension, and wake me up when they have a cure for paralysis – she just laughed ( perhaps not realising that I was completely serious )

So amongst other things, I went with Claire to the Tate Modern ( full of its latest selection of bonkers, non artistic crap ) and then to the Old Vic theatre. I’d booked tickets to see The Lorax, a Dr Seuss tale of man’s greed and exploitation of nature in the pursuit of profit.

As it was an evening show ( finishing at about 10.15 ) and it was advertised as a production that didn’t exactly stick to the original script, I didn’t count on there being hundreds of small children there.

For a laugh, I’d bought Claire a T shirt with writing on it, a Line from the first Die Hard movie, with Bruce Willis.

As a condition of Claire coming with me, I said she had to wear it.

I hadn’t anticipated her being berated by a middle class dad, and told off by an Old Vic steward as well.

It was kind of funny though… at least for me!

So what does a guy in a wheelchair do?

He goes to the Royal Geographical Society – last night was a talk – Brexit – the reasons and consequences. Good!

Before that, the Science Museum.

Before that the gym.

Recently, searching for a carer – online and through advertising.

I went to the Shard on Friday – go at 5 and watch London light up over  the next 2 hours, and drink wine….?

Invite your best friends around and thrash them at Bananagrams.

Go and help in a local school – kids are sooo entertaining!

Do your groceries online…

Provide paddling technique lessons to your mates.

Go to the theatre.

Go to the iMax and see amazing stuff in 3D.

Go to gigs – your companion goes free, as your helper.

Go to tonight’s debate on the West London Cycle SuperHighway, and say something provocative to get someone going…

Go to endless hospital appointments to do with catheters and skin cancer, and X Rays.

Read letters from your lawyer.

Meet up with a Mum whose son is in a wheelchair and needs advice.

Go and watch the local Amateur Dram plays – because actually they’re very good !

Buy fake tattoo sleeves online and wear them somewhere posh, so people look at you sniffily ( and then see their faces as you peel them off – then they smile! )

Go to the gym and do what you can, not to get fat, as that would only add to your multitude of problems…

And that’s it, really.

Oh, and chat online to usually dull females who are far too easily offended, but very occasionally find one that’s a real laugh…  and then after a bit mention the wheelchair, and see what happens next – interesting !

Hello Robert

I send to Stella my email and she pass it on to you.

Before I come on Sat. 21 Oct for interview . I just want to make sure with you what is your daily or weekly rate.   Maybe you can also tell me more about the work.

Thanks so much.  Hope to hear from you soon.

Enna

Hi Russel

Sorry through your name is Robert.

Enna

Me to E –

Hi there.
It would depend on how you are.
Cash?

Russ

Hi Russel

Sorry  I cannot do business like this.  That say nothing.  I am working for not less than £*** – ***per day.

Enna

Me to E –

I offer £***
But you also get to live in an lovely  apartment.
And I don’t need 24 hour attention.
🙂

Russel

I am working in East Horsley just see that P**** get his pills and his easy ready meals 3 times a day do no cleaning or ironing at all and in a beautiful house too. I get here also £***per day. Have no night calls and he do everything for himself.

I finish here on Sat. 21 Oct if you want to have a interview with me then it will be perfect like Stella said after 12.

Looking forward to meet you all then if it is ok with you.

Enna

Me to E –

Why does P**** need a carer?

Russ

Russel

His wife is away on holiday.  She cannot leave him alone.

Enna

Me to Enna-

Why not?

What is his condition ?

Russ

Russell

He is in the beginning of Altzheimer, but is still very good to help himself with most things just forget sometimes to take his medicine and are not very steady on his feet.  He also cannot prepare his own food.

Is that answer your question?

Enna

Me to Enna –

Who does the cleaning and laundry ?

Russ

Russel

Cleaner,  gardening  and secretary is coming in once a week do all the cleaning and ironing etc.  I just make-up is bed in the morning see that his bathroom is clean clean.  Always clean the kItchen and see that everything is clean allover.   Put washing in the washing machine and tumble dryer etc.  Drive him around with his car.

That is all my duties.

Enna

Me to Enna-

Do you wear your tiara whilst you warm up his ready made meals?

Russ

Enna to Stella –

Stella

How long are you work for Russel? First time somebody asked stupid funny questions. He sounds like if he is not a grown up man but very childish to me. What do you have to do for him? Any personal help?

Can you tell me more? How long do you work for him?

Enna

Russell

I just want to make sure if you want me for an interview or not.

If so my husband can bring me on Saturday before we go back to Wellingborough.

Thanks.

Enna

Me to E –

Dear Enna,

Thank you for getting in touch, however based on your correspondence with me so far, I do not feel that you show the qualities I would be looking for.

I need someone who doesn’t feel like they are working for me, but someone who works in partnership with me. Also, I would not want someone who would be limited to the bare minimum for a rate above and beyond the usual rate.

I do wish you well in the future, and I really do  hope that you are able to help P**** enjoy his life, as opposed to make him feel that you are just there to make money.

Many thanks,

Russ

A female live in assistant required to help me.
I had a cycling accident 4 years ago, and I’m now in a wheelchair, and single.
I need help with some personal care, such as washing and dressing, and getting into and out of bed because I just can’t do that by myself.

I’m out a lot and i make every effort to fill my days and evenings, but I do need assistance with things like cleaning and laundry, and I’m a hopeless cook, so you’d need to be able to do that. I’d need you to accompany me sometimes when I go places, especially if I drive as I can’t get into or out of the car without assistance. If you are over 25 with a clean licence I could put you on my car insurance, though that’s not essential.

I need someone that’s reasonably physically strong, and not allergic to exercise, but by no means a body builder… You’d need to be able to put my wheelchair in my car for example ( but my 12 year old daughter can do that, for example, so it’s not exactly heavy )

A full time live in could be perfect or else 2 people that can work by rotation.

I live in a lovely apartment, and you’d have your own bedroom ( obviously ) and ensuite bathroom, and full use of all facilities here. It’s in Chiswick and near a tube station and bus routes, and a railway station. Of course there is wifi and cable TV etc, and a great sound system, including on the roof terrace.
I might need you to come to the cinema and live music too. I buy the popcorn as well, and the drinks.

I need a fun personality, who appreciates life, and is proactive and sociable , and doesn’t mind staying up late sometimes.

I use a gym every day, and you can use it too, if you come with me. I can give you endless fitness tips, if you like.

Apply early to beat the rush… 🙂

Russ

A Syrian arrives in London as a new immigrant to Great Britain.
He stops the first person he sees walking down the street and says, “Thank you Mr. Britishman, for letting me come into this country, giving me housing, Income support, free medical care, free housing and a free education!”
The passer-by says, “You are mistaken, I am Egyptian.”
The man goes on and encounters another passer-by. “Thank you for having such a beautiful country here in Great Britain.”
The person says, “I not British, I am Pakistani.”
The new arrival walks further, and the next person he sees he stops, shakes his hand, and says, “Thank you for wonderful country Great Britain!”
That person puts up his hand and says, “I am from Afghanistan. I am not British.”
He finally sees a nice lady and asks, “Are you a British woman?”
She says, “No, I am from Africa.” Puzzled, he asks her, “Where are all the British?”
The African lady checks her watch and says, “Probably at work.”😎