Carers – it’s tough for them..

Things she said today – the 27 year old Carer  All hair and make up, this one.

Me – Can you make me a salad ? Use everything that’s in the fridge please.

She got out cucumber and lettuce.

I said what about the other things ?

She looked blankly
Like what ? she said.

I said ‘ carrots?’

I said the avocado?

I said the beetroot ?
You want betroots…?
Yes – for the salad


I said can you slice up some chicken breast – knowing that this bit is tricky for carers, I clarified by saying that the strips should be about the size of her little finger. I checked that she understood. She seemed to.
To my ( not ) surprise she cut slices twice as large as that and said ‘ is this ok?’ I said again about her cutting them up little finger sized. She didn’t seem to understand. Then she said ‘ how do you do that ?’
It’s hard to know how to respond to a question like that, isn’t it, to a 27 year old that’s there to do things like cooking. I mean it wasn’t as though I’d asked her to make me a Christmas cake that was gluten free, with an Aztec design, or machine tool me a new winder for my watch. I’d just asked her to cut up raw chicken into small pieces.

Im used to having to say everything 2 to 3 times before the things are done, and know that asking for 2 things at the same time will only lead to getting the last of the 2 things. I’d made the error of mentioning the salad and the chicken at the same time, and the chicken second, so only got the large chicken chunks.
When it’s quite clear that the carer has forgotten the first thing, a reminder from me always gets the same response – yes, I was planning to do that.
What exactly does that mean ? Planning ? To make a salad ? How exactly ?
I get i was planning to empty the bin, i was planning to turn off the lights, i was planning to close the fridge door, wash up the cups – anything you can name really.
How can these things take planning ? It’s like planning to breathe.. ok not quite that extreme but not too far off. I mean, don’t you just do these things without really having to think about them ?


‘I haven’t had a break all day’

She arrived at 10am and I was asleep until 1.15 pm having not slept til 8am.

She ‘ was waiting for me to wake up ‘ for those 3 hours and 15 Minutes
I said ‘ well wasn’t that a break, effectively ?’ I regretted using a long word, as I knew she wouldn’t understand that one.

She said no. ‘ I washed up 4 cups that were in the kitchen ‘
Ahhh – as she’d washed some cups, it was obviously a tough time for her. My error then.

More to follow…

4 thoughts on “Carers – it’s tough for them..

  1. I haven’t read your blog for couple of days and I just finished the catching up. What in God’s name is wrong with these people they keep sending you??.
    I have worked for sime time myself in this field both in a care company office and in the field. I have been a live in and also done thousands of domicilary clients….I faced lots of challenges, I dealt with over 100 carers but never ever met anyone lime these that you have got in the last 2 months….it is absolutely unbelievable what the agency understands of your care package and the amount of ignorance they have.
    When you were first assessed by whoever met you from the agency, first thing they should write down is that you need a person with at least upper intermediate level of English!!!!!!
    Sometimes carying fro you might be a bit difficult(i am saying tbis because i cared for you during the moving house period which was bit busy sometimes) but on a very lower level of difficulty. So, to be really honest, I am absolutely shocked about the level of ignorance the agencies have.

  2. Russ you do make me laugh. I remember when I lived in Shepperton when we first got married. My Husband worked in a Cinema so I fancied being an usherette. I only got the job at the A B C Staines because the uniform fitted me They didn’t ask me if I had a pulse that time. Love to you Margaret x x

    1. Margaret,
      Im sure you rocked the usherette outfit, and did a great job!
      Id certainly trust you to have looked after your dear husband so lovingly, so selling fags at the flicks must have been a doddle.
      Who was on in those days? Harold Lloyd etc ? 😉 x

      1. I didn’t last long as an usherette. The uniform was not very flattering but as the skirt fitted I got the job. They didn’t check your pulse in those days. I saw Ryan’s Daughter and Paint Your Wagon about 300 times each one. They didn’t let me loose selling the ice creams though. Another boring job I had was at the Papersticks Factory in Shepperton. I only lasted for one afternoon. You had to check these lolly sticks for imperfections. I have never been so bored in all my life. My Mother in Law asked me if I liked it there and I said “I wouldn’t make a career of it”. Love Margaret x x

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