‘I do ( but I don’t really mean it )’

For richer, for poorer.

For better, for worse.

In sickness and in health.

I think these phrases ought to be properly explained to prospective married couples, with examples cited, and talked through, pre church.

‘ If she gets MS, and gradually loses everything, if he loses his mind, if he loses his legs, gets half his face blown off, if she became a paraplegic… then what then? Would you still stick by them?

Far from everyone can cope with these things – the care required, the resources required, the change in their social lives,   the unconditional  love thats necessary, the adjustments to be made to their homes – all stressful stuff, but all hinted at in the marriage vows.

Rarely do people get married knowing that their health might suddenly deteriorate, prematurely, and I wonder how often people even consider the inevitable slide into lesser health that accompanies age/senility.

How a partner copes with their partner’s ‘ health downfall ‘ is a true test of whether that partner meant what she/he said/repeated that day at the alter.

I now look at couples and analyse them to a degree, or at least think about what might result from that  eventuality.   My conclusions ( which are all guesswork of course ) are that quite a few people probably didn’t think too hard about what they said at the alter,  the wedding being a lot more about the dress and the party than the real reason for betrothal.

5 thoughts on “‘I do ( but I don’t really mean it )’

  1. My Husband has advanced prostate cancer and has had a stroke. He cannot do much for himself. When I married him in 1971 I made the vows that included in “Sickness and in Health do death us do part” and I intend to do exactly that. It is not easy. Our lives have changed but that is what I promised to do. Love to you Margaret x

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