🦷

About 15 years ago I had a tooth removed and I had an implant put there instead. That’s where they drill into your jaw and make a metal peg, and then stick an artificial tooth on top of the peg, with super strong glue. It’s never supposed to come off, either.

A month ago mine did come off. ‘This was as well as the front tooth breaking off… anyway I did my usual and used superglue to stick it back in, trying not to get that all over my tongue and gum… and being partially successful. It did work, but then fell off again after a couple of days. So I tried it again, and the same happened. I think I stuck it back on about 5 times, but it always came off when I ate something sticky.

I then went on eBay and bought some proper dental glue stuff. I did figure that I had to get it exactly right, as this stuff would stick fast pretty quickly, so was careful not to put the tooth on the wrong way round!

It’s trickier than you think this dentistry malarkey, and is definitely best left to the professionals. I did stick it on, but not exactly as it should have been, probably because I used a bit too much glue, so it wouldn’t go on totally properly. I was reluctant to go to the dentist and tell him what I’d done, so thought I’d just leave it to settle. … and hey! It has.

Good as new now…

So if anyone wants any dentistry done, as long as it’s only gluing, I’m your man. Are there no end to my talents… ?

I had my catheter changed just now. I did actually do that myself a few times.. until it went wrong and I ended up in an ambulance. Now I leave it to the medics, not that that lot get it right every time, as I have found out to my eternal expense.

March 17th.

I had my hair cut yesterday. The Turkish lad cutting my hair showed me the video of the massacre in New Zealand. To say it’s chilling would scarcely describe it. It’s as though the killer is in one of those pointless but popular video war games, with him methodically going from room to room to kill everyone. He returns to each room to shoot most of the bodies again, to make absolutely sure. You get the impression that he is totally emotionless in the act, as a player would be in the game, where the targets aren’t actually real people.

I think it’s almost certainly going to spawn copycat shootings, in those that watched it and enjoyed it, and there are definitely going to be a lot of those amongst the disenchanted.

Automatic machine guns seriously don’t have a place in the world, other than strapped to soldiers.

I wouldn’t recommend watching that video btw.

Rhapsody

Wendy and I went to the Natural History Museum last night to see Bohemian Rhapsody, as staged by the Lunar Cinema. Great films in iconic places.

They kindly gave me free tickets after I’d said the Valentines Night buses and tubes had prevented us getting there that night.

Amazing venue for anything, that place.

We went by bus and got there early – imagine that! 45 minutes rather than 4 hours, this time…

This is the only picture taken of Wendy and I with my ex wife. ..

Well I never.

Well I’ll tell you what… things do seem to have changed. Two or three years ago I was regularly being made to feel very awkward/ being refused entry to buses when the bus had a baby’s buggy in the wheelchair space already. Drivers would frequently just not put down the ramp for me, or just shake their heads and drive off. Now that isn’t happening.

Before, it was quite common for a parent with a buggy to absolutely decline to give way to the wheelchair ( despite the law and the clear signage ). Now parents are smiling politely at me, moving buggies off the buses and ushering me on with cheery words. Males in particular are very gracious.

I do feel guilty when I effectively bump the pram off the bus, but to avoid confusion all round as to who has priority, I do board the bus and obviously thank the exiting buggy pusher.

It would seem to have crept into social convention then, this acceptance, at least in the areas I travel. The bus drivers too are smiling more.

Good, isn’t it?

Fun times…

My carer ( who is in her 30’s ) has spent her caring career looking after the very old or the very young.. obviously I’m not the latter but I’m not quite the former either.

Well apparently you have to be quite ‘ careful ‘ with your language at both ends of the age spectrum, for obvious reasons with the kids, and cos the elderly aren’t exactly ‘risqué ‘ as a rule, she says.

As a consequence ( and cos she is the churchy type ) when she is moved to ‘ insult ‘ me, she says such things as a ‘ you’re a Nincompoop !’ Obviously having been born in the wrong era to be insulted I just start laughing.

Today she went completely overboard and called me Cheeky Bones…?!

I don’t know but I think she’s overstepped the line there… so I’m monitoring the situation before making an official complaint.

In the meantime I’m wheeling carefully around her to avoid any more of her vicious name calling. Any advice from those experienced in domestic abuse environments welcome ….

What I’ve been up to, to distract myself.

I went to a talk by Michael Palin last week, with Marky P. If you don’t know, he’s a pretty famous fella, old Michael P.

He’s written a(nother) book, called Erebus – the story of a ship. In the talk he read extracts ( I’ve since realised ) rather than ‘ talked ‘ . I know that cos I’ve downloaded the audio book, which is narrated by him, and bits sound very familiar ( that’s cos I heard him read em out last week… )

Anyway, it’s a fascinating true account of a maritime world long gone, a time of extreme hardship at sea, with potential death around every corner ( or beyond every wave perhaps ). The ship was eventually lost at sea, all hands lost, along with Terra, her companion sister ship. However they recently discovered the wreck of Erebus in the frozen Canadian Arctic, hundreds of years after she disappeared without trace, so her story has been resurrected you could say.

Last night I met my buddy Russ in Richmond. The 2 Russ’s went to see Trevor McDonut McDonald speaking, but at the last minute he was substituted by Alistair Macgowan, the impressionist off the telly. Blimey that bloke is talented. His impressions are off the scale accurate, and he’s very intelligent and comedic with it. He also played the piano – classical pieces no less, rather than Les Dawson stylee, so it was entertaining on many levels. He might have crested in terms of career, but it’s a shame that he’s not still on the TV, as he’s a bit of a superstar. That’s the way of celebrity though- you only have a short shelf life these days, before some dopey reality tv ‘star ‘ gets far more limelight than their speck of talent deserves. I watched that fella Danny Dyer’s show the other day, then realised he’s on all the time. How can that be? He’s totally bereft of any talent at all. I think he’s off East Enders, which he’s only on because he has an East End accent. That hardly qualifies you to have your own show about history, does it? I doubt he couldn’t spell Enry the Aitff , let alone Henry the Eighth, so how has he ever been allowed near a history program? It’s a bleedin misstery to me mate, it is. He makes Phil Mitchell look like Einstein.

Wendy and I saw My Beautiful Boy the other night. Now that’s worth watching. Powerful and a bit tragic yes, but a very common tale for sure, and undoubtedly set to be more commonplace for kids growing up now. We went to the Body Worlds exhibition last week, and there’s a bit in it which explains that if your brain is largely only exposed to the ‘ thrill’ of computer games, smoking spliffs and screen excitement ( rather than social skills) whilst developing ( yes your brain develops neural connections when it experiences pleasure ) then you come to only experience pleasure when exposed to those same stimuli for life, rendering a kid/ young adult cerebrally addicted ( irreversibly ) to his / her computer, forever ‘ socially inadequate ‘ . That’s scary isn’t it?

GET YOUR KIDS OFF THEIR COMPUTERS then.. or be (partly) responsible for the ( lack of ) personality outcome.

You were warned….

Sucker

What do you do when repeated efforts to fix something fail ? Well you change tack and try another way, I have learned.

My looker afterer, G, is a talented girl. There are lots of things she does well, and enthusiasm isn’t missing at all.

Hoovering however seems to be beyond her. So bad in fact that you can’t tell any difference between the area she has done and an area she hasn’t. I fairly regularly pointed out the, well let’s say shortcomings, of her efforts, but ultimately all I achieved was a flat that wasn’t any better Hoovered and a put out help…..

So I bought a robotic vacuum cleaner instead… and she ( I’ve called her Henrietta, after her well known bro ) is a little dream. She’s thorough, DOESN’T GET DISTRACTED, DOESNT STOP TO CHAT, doesn’t ever take offence if I nudge her to go over a certain area again etc etc

Every paralysed bloke should have one, if not ( maybe ) every bloke full stop…. the home harmony she brings is definitely, definitely worth the pounds paid.

I did a tad of research online. She was rated No 1. She’s a Bagotta – black, slinky and slavishly obedient…. I think some people could get a Robovac fetish.

But not me – things aren’t quite that desperate ( yet )