A news report.


A campaign to stop people farting in cars when carrying children is being launched today. Wales’s chief medical officer explained that breathing in farts in enclosed spaces was harmful to children. ”Green-faced children can often be seen with their eyes watering, gagging as they breathe in the noxious fumes,’ he said.

However, the Welsh Institution for Freedom to Flatulate (WIFF) is about to launch its own ‘Better Out Than In’ campaign with a short film clled ‘Live And Let Fly’, which warns that buttock-clenching to hold in anal acoustics while driving has, in extreme cases, led to loss of control of the vehicle.

‘Silent But Deadly is bang on,’ said a WIFF spokesperson for WIFF. ‘Where would you rather have skid marks – the road or your undercrackers?’ Meanwhile, the AA has told drivers that trumping at the wheel is perfectly safe ‘so long as you open a window, keep both hands on the wheel and don’t ask passengers to pull your finger’.

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