Monthly Archives: February 2019

You’re in London now.

Somebody (who shall stay unnamed) went for a lady thing involving wax whilst at mine on the weekend. It made me laugh so I’ll spill. She arrived on time to be asked to go into the room and undress. She asked for the paper knickers that are normally given in Oxford.
She was told – no, we don’t have those here; just lie on the treatment bed and separate your knees.
Being shy, she found that embarrassing but did it, and the lady did her wax stuff.
Then the lady said ‘ ok, now turn over ‘
Unnamed said – why ?

So I can do the other side- said the lady.

In Oxford I just sort of lift up one leg at a time… said Unnamed.

Ok but I’d like you to turn over and lie on your front please. Thank you.
Ok now reach behind and pull your bum cheeks apart so I can do the wax properly.

Mortified of Oxford did as she was told….

Blimey, the power of authority these beauticians have !

Anyway it got me thinking about getting a Saturday job there, maybe.
There’s lots I can’t do, but I do have warm hands – gotta be useful as bum cheek puller aparters, right?
.. and I identify as a woman on Saturdays.
I’ll let you know how my interview goes …

Okayyy then!

I saw my daughters at the weekend, with my parents ( their grandparents obviously ).

We had a fun afternoon together. We talked about their schools a bit. In the course of that chat the subject of school attitude towards gender and sex.

See below for the explanations of what was until fairly recently a fairly straightforward business….

SEXUALITY
Romantic Orientation- Who you are romantically attracted to meaning wanting to be in a romantic relationship with and is unrelated to sexual attraction.
Sexual Orientation- Who you are sexually attracted to meaning who you get turned on by or who you would want to engage in sexual behaviors with.

*note all listed below are applicable also to romantic orientations. These take the prefix of the word and the ending -romantic, i.e. heteroromantic, panromantic, aromantic.

Heterosexual- The attraction to a gender different from their own (commonly used to describe someone who is gender binary [female or male] attracted to the other binary gender).
Homosexual- The attraction to a gender the same as their own (commonly used to describe someone who is gender binary [female or male] attracted to the same binary gender).  Sometimess referred to as gay.
Lesbian- Women who are attracted only to other women
Bisexual- When you are attracted to two or more genders.  This term is generally used to describe being attracted to men and women, but can apply to being attracted to any two or more genders. Note that you do not have to be equally attracted to each gender.
Pansexual- When you are attracted to all genders and/or do not concern gender when you are attracted towards someone
Bicurious- People who are open to experiment with genders that are not only their own, but do not know if they are open to forming any sort of relationship with multiple genders.
Polysexual- When you are attracted to many genders
Monosexual- Being attracted to only one gender
Allosexual- When you are not asexual (attracted to at least one gender)
Androsexual- Being attracted to masculine gender presentation
Gynosexual- Being attracted to feminine gender presentation
Questioning- People who are debating their own sexuality/gender
Asexual- Not experiencing sexual attraction (note that you can also be aromantic and you do not necessarily have to be asexual and aromantic at the same time).  Sometimes the term, ace, is used to describe asexuals.
Demisexual- When you only experience sexual attraction after forming a strong emotional bond first or a romantic bond
Grey Asexual- When you only experience attraction rarely, on a very low scale, or only under certain circumstances
Perioriented- When your sexual and romantic orientation targets the same gender (for example being heteromantic and heterosexual or being biromantic and bisexual)
Varioriented- When your sexual and romantic orientations do not target the same set of genders (for example being heteromantic and bisexual or being homoromantic and pansexual)
Heteronormative- The belief that hetersexuality is the norm and that sex, gender, sexuality, and gender roles all align
Erasure- Ignoring the existance of genders and sexualities in the middle of the spectrum
Cishet- Someone who is both cisgendered and heterosexual.  This is sometimes used as a slur.
Polyamorous- An umbrella term referring to people who have or are open to have consensually have relationships with multiple people at the same time
Monoamorous- People who have or or open to have relationships with only one other person at a time.  The term, monogamous, is also sometimes used.
Queer- A reclaimed slur for anybody in the LGBT+ community or who do not identify as cisgender and/or hetersexual/heteromantic
Ally- A supporter of the LGBT+ community that does not identify as LGBT+
GENDER & SEX
Sex- Your assigned gender at birth and/or the gender of your reproductive organs
Gender- Where you feel that you personally fall on the spectrum between male and female. Commonly people identify as male or female, but some fall in the middle or move throughout the spectrum.
Cisgender- When you identify with the gender you were assigned at birth
Transgender- When you identify with a gender different than that you were assigned at birth
Transsexual- When you have had Gender Reassignment Surgery (GRS) to change the sexual organs you were born with to that of a different gender.

note that you will sometimes see an astrid after Trans (Trans) which is meant to include both transgendered and transsexual individuals

Male to Female (MtF)- When somebody that is assigned as a male at birth identifies as a female
Female to Male (FtM)- When somebody that is assigned as a female at birth identifies as a  male
Binary- The genders at each end of the gender spectrum (male and female)
Non-Binary- An umbrella term for genders that fall somewhere in the middle of the gender spectrum and are neither strictly male or female.  This can be used as a gender identification without further explanation.  Sometimes the term, genderqueer, is used.
Genderfluid- Moving between genders or having a fluctuating gender identity
Agender- Not identifying with any gender.  Sometimes referred to as being genderless or gendervoid
Bigender-  Identifying as two genders, commonly (but not exclusively) male and female.  Sometimes you feel like both genders at the same time and sometimes you fluctuate.
Polygender- When you identify with multiple genders at once.  Sometimes referred to as multigender.
Neutrois- When you identify as agender, neither male nor female, and/or genderless
Gender Apathetic- When you really do not identify nor care about any particular gender.  You are fine passing off as whatever and you really do not have an opinion towards your own gender.
Androgyne- This term overlaps a lot between gender identification and presentation.  It can be used to describe others and as an identification.   This term is used to describe people who are neither male nor female or are both male and female.  Basically anyone who does not fit into a binary gender category.
Intergender- Somebody who’s gender is somewhere between male and female
Demigender- When you feel as if you are one part a defined gender and one or more parts an undefined gender.  Terms can include demigirl, demiboy, demiagender, ect.
Greygender- Somebody with a weak gender identification of themselves
Aporagender- Somebody with a strong gender identification of themselves that is non-binary
Maverique- A non-binary gender that exists outside of the orthodox social bounds of gender
Novigender- A gender that is super complex and impossible to describe in a single term
Designated gender- A gender assigned at birth based on an individuals sex and/or what gender society percieves a person to be
AFAB- Assigned Female At Birth
AMAB- Assigned Male At Birth
Gender roles- Certain behaviors an activities expected/considered acceptable of people in a particular society based upon their designated gender
Gender Presentation- The gender you present yourself to others.  This is sometimes referred to as gender expression
Transitioning- The process of using medical means to change your sex
Intersex- A biological difference in sex that is when people are born with genitals, gonads, and/or chromosomes that do not match up exactly with male or female.  Intersex individuals can have any romantic/sexual orientation and can have any gender identification.  Intersex individuals are about as common as redheads.
Dyadic- Someone who is not intersex and when their gentinals, gonads, and chromosomes can all match into either a male or female category
Trans Woman- Someone who is assigned as a male at birth, but identifies as a woman
Trans Man- Someone who is assigned as a female at birth, but identifies as a man
Trans Feminine- Someone who identifies as feminine, but identifies as neither a man nor a woman.  They must also be assigned male at birth.
Trans Masculine- Someone who identifies as masculine, but identifies as neither a man nor a woman.  They must also be assigned female at birth.
Social Dysphoria- Discomfort experienced when acting in ways socially different than your gender or being being addressed in ways different to your gender
Body Dysphoria- Discomfort experienced because of the difference between gender and your sex, role, or gender expression
Butch- A term used to describe someone who’s gender expression is more masculine than feminine.  This is commonly used in describing women or lesbians.
Femme (Fem)- A term used to describe someone who’s gender expression is more feminine than masculine.  This is commonly used in describing women or lesbians.
Binarism- Putting gender strictly into two categories (male and female) and refusing to acknowledge genders outside of male and female.

The thing about the iBot is that facility to stand me up. I really wasn’t born to be 3 feet 10. Well actually I was born to be about 15 inches, but then I grew a lot later on.

When you are the shortest person in the room you just can’t bloody see what’s going on. Last week I went to a gig in my iBot with Wendy, Leigh and Bev. It was the quite unique GLC, playing in Staines. Firstly it was weird going to Staines for the first time in years. I had my business there for 20 years, until my injury put pay to that, leading to my exit. To go back to Staines was a bit nostalgic for sure, as is so much when revisited in a wheelchair.

Anyway, in a small venue full of pretty pissed ( but friendly ) people, it enabled me to be right at the front – like Robocop in the Mosh Pit. The iBot is certainly fascinating to all males, it being a technological marvel up there on 2 wheels and not falling over.

As it happened I had wayyyy too much to drink ( carried away in the company of Welsh people and the Welsh band ) and I was DICOAI ( drunk in charge of an iBot ) – not clever when you are 13 miles from home and you’ve almost missed the last bus. I can’t even remember ( blimey, not good ) getting home. Thank God for Wendy then..

The Goldie Lookin Chain were just brilliant- as funny as f…. – there seminal track is called Your mother’s got a Penis … and they did it last. Just too funny those Welsh boys see.

Tidy.

Talking about Wales, yes we won last night against the Frogs. Bloody marvellous comeback it was ( especially on my Dad’s birthday! ) – watched by me on my mobile phone whilst at the gig – isn’t modern technology helpful!

Any volunteers to change my iBot inner tube- very welcome… it’s just like a bicycle tyre. My lack of ability to bend down means I just can’t get anywhere near it.

Maybe I can train the budgie?

Is there a Fanny Mechanic in the house….?!

Saturday night!

The buses to the rescue then. I’ve learned that when in need they are most likely to actually get me to where I need to be.

There are far more buses than there are trains, and far more bus stops than there are train/tube stations- at least in London anyway. If you can’t get exactly the right one, you can get a different one that at least gets you closer to your ideal destination.

From the SSE Arena it was about 500m to the bus stop, then a 385 to Ealing, then another 500m on the pavement, then an E2 pretty much all the way home – as in within 150 m of my front door.

So bingo then! Back safely…. to find water dripping through the ceiling in my hallway. Oh well… it’s not as if I can do anything other than send an email to the construction company – my home is still very much under guarantee, being a new build. It’ll get sorted…

Anyway, more drama in the night as poor Fanny seems to have been spotted by a fox – well it can’t get in, can it, but it can wander around within a few feet of her ( the other side of the glass ) I don’t have any curtains in the living room where she is, so it’s a lil sheet over her cage I think overnights from now on, rather than having her scared beakless.

Cute Fanny flaps a lot when spooked, and we can’t have that. A happy Fanny is ever so important to me – ask Wendy and she’ll tell you.

Bugger

Having travelled by 2 trains and 2 buses to get to Wembley in my iBot ( as I want to ‘ stand up ‘ in the Wombats gig ) I get a puncture 10 yards from the entrance to the stadium…,

That’s me not standing up then!

And still gotta get back later.